I realize I haven’t written for awhile. I have this thing where I don’t want to write a post unless I feel that it’s truly worthwhile. I perseverate a bit over each post, but now here I am, about to go on a little vacation with my love and I’m just going to quickly drop a quick post.
Things are well, really good in fact. Yes, this sort of thing has a long tail and there is always going to be stuff that comes up. The main thing lately is the fact that some close family and friends have not yet seen my husband or us together since ‘the earthquake’. That plays out in very painful ways and yet, if I look, I can find some silver linings in even that. Sometimes it’s just plain funny too and I get a good giggle about it to myself. I can tell that it’s a really big deal to some people when all of a sudden we are thrown together with them. Inside I roll my eyes wishing we could just be with friends or family who have been with us lots since getting back together. BUT I persevere as they eyeball us carefully looking for nuances that might give some clue to all of what transpired or what they think transpired. Who really knows what transpired right! I bite my tongue just short of saying, “so then, once you’ve sorted out what went wrong with us could you kindly send me an email spelling it all out because sometimes I’m just dying to know how I could have prevented all this . . . “.
We’re going to be with some family shortly who haven’t seen us together. I can’t tell you how much I am looking forward to this. This is the family I chose to go be with for a period of time back when my husband left for the 2nd time. This is where I rode my bike for hours, talking to God but mostly I listened for Him and read, rested, hung out with these relatives and had the change that was needed. They can’t wait to see us and have told us both as much in their inimitable way! We were out for coffee last Friday and one of them texted something that brought tears to my husbands eyes. Is that healing or what?!!!
The other super healing thing that just goes to show that one should never burn a bridge! There has been some fairly not nice stuff and unsupportive stuff over the years and especially during our marriage crisis from part of some extended family. We just came through a wonderful large celebration for one of our kids and there were some healing pieces that all of us felt from this extended family. I mean significant pieces and they were quite overt actually. Like an olive branch bouquet!!! We find ourselves ruminating over these expressions of love, respect, and enjoyment over and over again.
Thank you so much for reading this blog. I pray for you guys you know. I can’t begin to say how much I wish you weren’t reading this because I know you’re here because of the great pain you’re in or you’re reading to help a loved one through their great pain.